Pushing through Pain

Nobody talks about it... the time it takes to heal! Moreso what that looks like at each stage. Some days are pretty and other days, not so much. Some days are smooth and others extremely rough but the point is showing up. How do we show up in the midst of pain? This is much easier for some than others. For me I have been trained to compartmentalize so I carry pain a bit too well for my liking to the point where people can't see or feel it. This leaves me isolated in my pain with no landing place...

But, what is the alternative? Sharing in spaces that can't hold the weight of what I have to release or laying a heavy brick on someone who don't have the capacity to carry the vast amount of spill off that will flow once the door is opened? Neither of these seems viable. I realized this early and knew that I had to find a healthier and more conducive option before the weight of what I carried inside begun to weary me. It was at this point that I figured out how to hand it to Jesus.

This was not something I knew how to do before but when I cried out Jesus helped me. That scripture that speaks to taking His burden and His yoke (Matthew 11: 28-30 - Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light) became my reality. I held a picture in my head of a child being taken to or from school and their hands are empty, they skip along the sidewalk with ease and the adult whether parent, guardian, relative whomever is carrying the child's load with a smile on their face as they experience the joy of the child. That is how I imagine my life with Christ.

This changed everything! I wanted to be like that kid. I wanted to skip through life regardless of what was happening knowing that the adults would take care of it. Believing that it was not any of my concern. This is me now! TODAY! I am that child in the sight and presence of my Yah. I just throw things in His hands and keep moving. I cry at His feet because He collects my tears; I vent to His ears because He actually cares; I leave empty and filled simultaneously. Fear tries to creep in, doubt tags along with it, anxiety staying close in line but I know who I am and more than that I know who HE IS. My God is big, bigger than any pain that attempts to cripple me. He allows nothing to be wasted so this pain too will birth purpose. My role is to let it.

Sometimes the best thing to do is nothing! That applies to painful situations as well. We often try to numb the pain, stop ourselves from feeling it, try to distract from it when the best thing to do is sit in it. Allow yourself to feel every bit of the discomfort that the pain produces. Much like grapes that are crushed and diamonds that are heated to become something better, different, stronger, valuable etc. so to must we be stretched and pain is part of that process. I pray that everyone reading this learns this because life is filled with painful moments and stopping is not an option. But, pressing while in the arms of Christ makes the processing of the pain pliable.

Anyway, happy new month Kingdomites, continue to be well and remember God loves you and I do too.